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What is unconditional love?

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What is unconditional love?

Post by Goblin84 on Mon Jun 30, 2008 4:15 pm

I have been thinking about this a lot lately ...

So what is unconditional love Does it mean you stay in a marriage where your partner is cheating on you and says they no longer love you That's just one example. I guess I am having a problem distinguishing unconditional love from letting someone trample all over you. Or would you be fine with their trampling because you love them unconditionally

To start, I believe I can love someone unconditionally without condoning certain actions they may take toward me. I feel like if I am cheated on, I can still be happy and still love my partner, but I will no longer maintain a relationship with him.

What does everyone else think It doesn't have to pertain to cheating, that's just an example I use.
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Re: What is unconditional love?

Post by real on Sun Jul 06, 2008 12:36 pm

Unconditional love is essentially non judgment, in my opinion. As consequence of unconditional love as your mindset, you focus on positive things in people (naturally ignoring negative aspects) and discover rather similarities than differences to you. This mindset genuinly encourage you to give sincere compliments and act friendly and to forgive.

Do not confuse unconditional love with moral dogmas. If your girl does not love you anymore, there is a reason for that. Attraction is not a choice (as DeAngelo states). Educate yourself how to sparkle attraction in a woman and you will win your wife's love back (or feel free to fall in love with another woman).

This actually applies to all aspects of life. Take the responsibility for everything has happened, happens and will happen in your life and change yourself first if you want to change your life. Once again, not your wife, friends, business partners or the whole world, but change yourself.
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Re: What is unconditional love?

Post by judi_kid on Sat Jun 06, 2009 7:00 am

in "unconditional love" i disagree with your example
i don't think it is to let someone walk all over you
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Re: What is unconditional love?

Post by Balance on Sat Jun 06, 2009 7:57 am

Sorry to say but I am perfectly sure that there is no such thing as unconditional love.

There are different kinds of love - from friends (where the term love seems a bit displaced) to partnership-love and over to the kind of love a mother feels towards her child. Believe it or not but none of them are unconditional -meaning that there are certain conditions under which love simply gets ripped apart - especially when survival is at stake. "Motherlove" comes as close to unconditional love as you can get but even that is not 100% unconditional.

Now I assume we are primarily talking about the kind of love towards a partner. This is by far one of the most conditional kinds of love! Think about it, if your partner wasn't the way (s)he is (character/looks/...) you might not even be attracted to her/him in the first place - so this kind of love is highly conditional meaning that certain conditions must be met at all times for this kind of love to form and last. Divorce rates mirror this, in fact it is fairly hard to constantly meet all the conditions/ needs under which partnership-love can be sustainable. Unconditional love between partners? - you must be dreaming!

If you want to develop unconditional love you should give it up now - this is simply not the way humans work.
Even if you could theoretically achieve it - what's the point if your partner doesn't see you meeting the conscious and subconscious conditions SHE applies to the partnership and walks out on you? You would be chasing a ghost, forget it.

Incidentally this reminds me of when I was chasing another "ideal" that supposedly existed: harmony.
That was until I realized that in a world of inevitably conflicting interests (within yourself and between you and other people/ living things) there can be no such thing. There can only be balance. :wink:
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