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Is this how life should be?

Asking yourself right questions can often speed up your way towards the life of your dreams

Moderator : developing_success


 

Is this how life should be?

Post by surxeon on Wed Oct 03, 2012 7:08 am

Hi,
as everyone who started reading this, I too believe life should fun,joy and success and not pain,misery and suffering.my story is a bit long,but i would appreciate if you read and help me.

I am a 34 year old married man;for past 31 years I lived with my parents and brothers in a small town.after being married for 2 years and no job i decided to move away to a bigger city.I came to capital of my country and studied hard for almost a year,through this period i along with my wife suffered alot financially,personally and mentally.
we never had a husband-wife relationship as we already were going through bad time.since the place was new to us we never had a social life.we were living with a hope that one day things would change.
I finally succeeded and got a job in one of the top MNC here in capital.life changed.I can now feel financial freedom.we started spending by our own;but now after one year of my job,I want to go back to my home town.I cant live the lifestyle my job demands of me,I miss my family,I dont like this city anymore .In my job I cant concentrate,i always think of what my wife would be doing alone in the house.she never told me but I feel she misses her home too(in the same town i used to live).I know i now can earn in my home town as well,atleast I would have a "home advantage" which i never realised.I dont like doing my job now,mentally I am in a dilemma.what I should do?I discussed this with my wife 3-4 times and the outcome of that was very very bad.she does'nt want to go back as she has some issues with my family members.As i am the bread earner, In this scenario i cant even see any family future for us.my job isnt paying me so high that i would continue just for the sake of money.my wife loves the freedom we now have.even though,we live almost 1000 miles away from our hometown,now as well we dont have a social life,just two of us.this is not the life i wanted,ever.
Now the mental dilemma has took me very hard,I have started taking sleeping pills.i have high mood swings,i am loosing my confidence in every part of my life.I have even started forgetting things.sometime i cant understand what other person is saying ,i can only hear sound but cant understand.It does sound very weird that someone wants to turn away after reaching the final milestone but for my wife,my safe and secure future life, I want to go back.
thanks for reading this far.
I am in trouble mates,help me!!

Thanks & regards
surxeon
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