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A drunk Conversation made me realize...

Talking about anything that doesn't fit into other categories of this personal development forum

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A drunk Conversation made me realize...

Post by rugard on Wed Jun 25, 2008 8:45 am

Last night was the first time I have ever been drunk!

- And by god it was amazing.

But on the way home I had a conversation with a very good Female Friend called Fiona. Now Fiona is incredibly intelligent and I love her to pieces and since it was my first time getting drunk I had very little control of my faculties on the way home...

So we started talking and we got onto talking about me, and how I am much nicer when I am drunk because I open myself up more. You see in normal, sober consciousness I am very very aware of what I am doing, so much so that I act very reserved and very that I guard myself too well.

Fiona was telling me that I need to be more vulnerable, I need to open myself up more, and when I was drunk, I was totally doing it. And I KNEW I was doing it. But I told her something I very rarely utter...

I don't know how.

Now for some people thats not a big deal, but for me thats a very big deal because I am always trying to be the best at everything and I know that thats not very good, I am totally aware but...still...

I told her I don't know how to make myself more vulnerable. And frankly I don't. I have so many barriers built up from years of personal emotional disregard that I can only see these barriers...I can't figure out what to do...and I would appreciate suggestions...

(oh and I didn't get a hang over....I had 3 cans of Cider, Cherry Lambrigini, a can of Carling Lager, some Vodka, 2 red Bulls and ermm thats it....and NO HANG OVER. I am so proud.)
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Re: A drunk Conversation made me realize...

Post by developing_success on Thu Jun 26, 2008 9:00 am

You don't need to be drunk to do that, you will link more pleasure to drinking, and you'll soon be a drunker, and we all know that your life will be OVER if you do not pass over it.
I've manage to do that when i'm really tired or when i'm at the point to turn mad, i become hyper-active, I get a lot of confidence and i'm also in a funny mood (in a good way), i also say the TRUTH that it is not said too often about all things in theme with the discussion. I like that experience, but doesn't happen too often.

My advice: Try to do it consciously or you will link pleasure to drinking for the fact that you can express, like smokers link to cigars because they focus on them and take their mind off what they worry about plus they get addicted.

PS: I do not drink any kind of alcohol, "I don't put trash in My Temple (Body)"

With Respct,
D_S
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Re: A drunk Conversation made me realize...

Post by SmileAwhile on Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:25 am

Congratulations on a new life experience.
Just like developing_success, I don't drink much either but I have been pretty sauced before in my past.

I think one cool thing is that now you KNOW that you have the capibility to let down your barriers and be vulnerable! :)


rugard wrote:. . . . I need to be more vulnerable, I need to open myself up more, and when I was drunk, I was totally doing it. And I KNEW I was doing it.


So, just like riding a bicycle, at first we start with training wheels, the extra little wheels on the side that help us get our confidence and know we can do it. Then, pretty soon, the wheels come off and we're cruising along like we were always a pro!


Life is much too short to stay all bottled up inside... it will eat at you and keep you from enjoying so many of the beautiful things life has to offer.

Like anything in life, sometimes we have to practice at stuff until we become good at it and can do it without thinking - letting your guard down is no different.

But don't expect for it to always go perfectly. . .

Just like learning to ride a bike, sometimes we faulter and skin our knee and it might hurt a little, but the reward you get for getting back up and trying again is so worth a little bruise.

Start with opening up about small things - even with strangers if you have to.
It's great that you can open up when your drunk but you don't want to restrict yourself to only feeling free when there's alcohol - cause either you won't be open most of the time or you'll stay drunk just so you can feel good.

Learning to open up and be vulnerable may be uncomfortable at first, at it might take some practice, but the reward you will get in the long run will be so worth it!

Good luck to you my friend...
Please keep us updated and let us know how it goes.
We're all here for you!
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Re: A drunk Conversation made me realize...

Post by debcrow on Mon Jul 13, 2009 6:29 pm

Excuses Begone is a great book for this... Dr. Wayne Dwyer gets past the excuse I see here;

rugard wrote:
I told her I don't know how to make myself more vulnerable. And frankly I don't. I have so many barriers built up from years of personal emotional disregard that I can only see these barriers...I can't figure out what to do...and I would appreciate suggestions...
this is an excuse and is totally changeable.

(oh and I didn't get a hang over....I had 3 cans of Cider, Cherry Lambrigini, a can of Carling Lager, some Vodka, 2 red Bulls and ermm thats it....and NO HANG OVER. I am so proud.)

I didn't get one either after my very first time,,, but that soon caught up with me.

I was the exact same way when I was younger, I was shy, reserved and my low self-esteem didn't know how to talk to people. I didn't think I was interesting enough. So, drinking brought me out of myself and hey... I was having fun. This lasted for a few years until the drinking started causing emotional upheavels... all my 'barriers' started breaking down through the alcohol and created quite a mess in my life. I don't drink much now at all, lost the desire for the falling down, can't get up feelings.

Another late post but hey.... there's someone else out there with this same issue.
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Re: A drunk Conversation made me realize...

Post by hypertrader on Tue Jul 14, 2009 7:48 pm

thanks to everyone who shared their experiences about the nasty things alcohol can do to you......to everybody who has honestly admitted how nasty alcoholism can be be, i say this from the bottom of my heart, "i feel you".

my experience with the bottle brought me a lot of fun initially just like it did for a lot of you.....but the nightmare that i went thru after the fun phase was over was so nasty, that i wish i had done things differently......i was in england for 3 years and that was when it got worse.....what started off as 3-4 cans of beer after getting back from university in the evening turned into full fledged alcohol addiction......i reached a point where i would wake up in the morning and drink straight from the bottle even before i brushed my teeth.......i quit alcohol twice when i was in england but it was only for a fortnight or so before i got hooked on to it again........both the times i did not go to rehab but decided to do it by myself......what made it even worse was flatmates went to their respectives countries for holidays (i think christmas of one year and easter of another year).....i was left alone in the flat.....i didn't go out to party both times because i knew i wasn't strong enough to resist the temptation of everyone drinking on such days.......i kept myself busy by cleaning the kitchen, cleaning the shower, the toilets of the flat, hoovering the entire flat, etc.......i couldn't do it the first 3 days because of the withdrawal symptoms i experienced; just imagine yourself lying in bed (the first day i was trying to quit), with the heater turned on maximum.....yes the heating was on max even in april during easter that time.......and i was in bed shivering like a had a fit.......imagine shivering like that for 3 days non-stop......yes it gets that nasty, for the first week i slept for 8 hours totally (not 8 hours each night).......because my body was used to sleeping when drunk, that there was no way i could sleep when there was no alcohol in my body......after 3 days i started keeping myself busy by cleaning the entire flat like i mentioned before.....i even went to work (i was working part-time to support my education.....its really expensive in england especially if you go there to study)........i had reached a stage where i found myself at complete peace when i was alone.....i used to get paranoid when i would go out to friends parties, bars, clubs, etc......i lost my girlfriend........

alcohol can do nobody any good.......so please do not try to seek comfort by using it.......its just an excuse to run away from reality (i say this only for the people who started drinking socially and have crossed that line).......the end is nasty........this is the first post that i found which could lead the poster (rugard) on the path i walked a few years ago......ITS NOT WORTH IT......i keep myself clean by taking it one day at a time.....and its working.

the answers to all your problems in life are in you......don't look for them in the outside world.....try looking deeper within yourself......you'll be amazed at how powerful the human body and the human mind is........i used the SILVA METHOD to solve my problems......i've used EFT as well and found it to be extremely powerful

i tried a lot of methods to get me back to lead a normal life.....the most powerful were:
1) SILVA METHOD
2) EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE (EFT)
3) SEDONA METHOD
4) AMERICAN MONK (BURT GOLDMAN) - MINDBOX

burt goldman's guided meditation called 'daisy pond' is about 17 minutes long.....all you have to do is listen and his voice guides you........trust me guys, just loose yourself in his voice and let him lead the way.........when u open your eyes after 17 minutes, i promise you the feeling is magical.....but please do not practice these methods just for the heck.....you need a voice inside of you that says "i'm ready for a change".....and then give it your best shot......it will definitelt work if you follow it to the T.

i keep myself motivated by listening to at least 1 hour of any motivational speaker as soon as i wake up.....thats how i get fired up as soon as i wake up......my mind thinks about only positive things......i'm busy trading the markets during the day, but i keep extremely ambient music on at all times in the background (very soft so that it doesn't distract my trading)......when i go for evening walks i listen to Louise Hay.....her affirmations and her audiobooks, as well as dr. robert anthony are life-transforming....there's some magic when i listen to it while i take my evening walk.....

i'm not sure if this post of mine belongs to this thread, but if i can save a few of you from what i experienced a few years ago, i will consider it worthwhile (embarassing myself on this website).......for all of you who read every word i typed, thanks a million.....the SMV website also kept me motivated.......i wish i had discovered this website earlier when i left england in 2007.......thanks to each and every single one of you who is genuinely here to help others to get to their dreams.....good luck.
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